What the Bible REALLY says about marriage

From the HuffPo:

There is, however, a unifying theme to the diverse pictures of God-ordained marriages in the Bible, and it is that different kinds of unions are accepted in different places and times, evolving in tandem with broader cultural shifts. ...

we see two principles at work: that biblical mandates for marriage shifted according to perceived cultural needs, and that the interpretive choice of what is seen as applicable today begins with the reader's preconceived notions before ever opening the Bible.... 

Each of these biblical standards for marriage -- polygamy, marriage within the family, reproduction with a late husband's closest kin, prohibitions against intermarriage -- were seen as vital in some historical contexts as reflected in the Bible, and not in others....Kinship and property are important factors in many biblical marriages; one element that rarely figures into biblical standards for marriage, however, is love. 

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Some point to Adam and Eve as the authoritative model because Jesus refers to them in Mark 10:1-12. ...He adds -- and this is the clearest statement about marriage that Jesus makes -- that anyone divorced and remarried is committing adultery. The logic behind reading this as the authoritative statement about heterosexuality and not about divorce or remarriage is, shall we say, questionable. Notably, it's hard to find too many heterosexual married people (including those who appeal to the Bible in opposition of gay marriage) who argue that divorce and remarriage should be illegal. 

While the traditional view is that the Bible sets standards, and cultures either follow these standards or don't, the Bible itself shows us that cultural norms and biblical positions shifted in tandem. This does not mean that anything goes; it's simply what we see in the biblical texts themselves. It does not mean that there are no standards; there were always incest taboos, for example, but what counts as incest is culturally dictated, and our society does not embrace many biblical perspectives on this (e.g., the ideal of marrying one's first cousin). It does not mean that God is a pushover; it shows, if anything, a God who will engage people in the world in which they live.